Day 17: Love Promotes Intimacy

The Dare:

Determine to guard your mate's secrets (unless they are dangerous to them or to you) and to pray for them. Talk with your spouse, and resolve to demonstrate love in spite of these issues. Really listen to them when they share personal thoughts and struggles with you. Make them feel safe.

The Questions:

How much of an effort is it for you to hold back from saying something, critical or otherwise? What have you learned about your spouse today, simply from listening?

My Thoughts:

Kyle and I don't have any real secrets, but if we did, I would definitely feel safe sharing with him and him with me. We trust each other wholeheartedly. I have no doubt that we are each others comfort in good times and bad times and we can lean on each other for everything.

Day 16: Love Intercedes

I've obviously taken a LOT more than 40 days to do this Love Dare. I wish I hadn't, but that's just how it's been.

So, now I'm updating from Day 16 (and 17) and will hopefully be able to keep it going and flowing along till it's complete. But, it is summer, so we'll see how that goes.

If it's been awhile since I've updated, feel free to give me a little reminder and light a fire under my bum. I won't mind.

Moving on...

The Dare:

Begin praying today for your spouse's heart. Pray for three specific areas where you desire for God to work in your spouse's life and in your marriage.

The Questions:

Have you experienced the power of prayer in the past? What did you choose to pray about? Was it easy for you, or did it feel foreign to you?

My Thoughts:

I thought about keeping the areas I'm praying for private, but what the heck, I'll put them out there.

1. That Kyle would "lead" our family in a way that is pleasing to God.

Not that he doesn't, but there's always room for improvement.

2. That he would stop being so judgmental about people and their looks or background.

This one bothers me a lot. And I know a lot of it has to do with his upbringing.

3. That he would know God on a deeper level.

Both of us need to work on this. We don't pray together and I feel like there are times where just looking at us or being around us, you wouldn't know that we're Christians and that bothers me, too.

Hopefully in praying for these areas for Kyle, it will affect me too.

A Teaser

Sorry, this is just a teaser post to let you, the few people that actually read this blog, know that I'm sorry to have been neglecting this.

It's been a bit crazy and busy in these parts and I've sort of put The Love Dare on the back burner. But I'm determined to finish it so I'll be back to updating this soon.

Day 15: Love Is Honorable

The Dare:

Choose a way to show honor and respect to your spouse that is above your normal routine. It may be holding the door for her. It might be putting his clothes away for him. It may be the way you listen and speak in your communication. Show your mate that he or she is highly esteemed in your eyes.

The Questions:

How did you choose to show honor? What was the result? What are some other ways you could demonstrate honor in the coming days?

My Thoughts:

I have been making it a point to try to keep the house more tidy and picked up. It is not an easy task for me because, although I hate the clutter, I also hate cleaning. Call me lazy. It's just not something I've been cut out to do. So it's been difficult, but because I know that it makes us both happier to live in cleanliness, I've been trying.

I've also been putting Kyle's clothes away. Along with everything else that is a "chore", I also despise folding the clothes. BUT because I know it makes things easier to find for Kyle, I've been doing what I can to make sure his clothes are clean, folded and put away.

He hasn't really said anything, but I'm not really expecting him to.

Day 14: Love Takes Delight

The Dare:

Purposefully neglect an activity you would normally do so you can spend quality time with your spouse. Do something he or she would love to do or a project they'd really like to work on. Just be together.

The Questions:

What did you decide to give up? What did you do together? How did it go? What new thing did you learn (or relearn) about your spouse?

My Thoughts:

Well, as I mentioned before, this one has taken me awhile to do. But, I got to thinking about it and I think I've already done it without "purposefully" doing it. So does that mean I'm cheating? Depends on how you look at it, but I really don't think so.

So, what did we do?

We "got it on". LOL

There have been a couple instances recently when I would rather sit on the computer instead of having sex, but because Kyle wanted to, I did. And of course, it's always good to connect / reconnect that way.

{ahem}

And that's all I'm gonna say about that.

Moving on.

Day 15 coming soon.

I Haven't Forgotten

I know it seems like I go a long time between posts here. But this next dare isn't easy to figure out! So I'm thinking I may have to skip it and come back to it or something. In the mean time, I just wanted to let you know that I'm still here and will be back with an update soon.

OH! And I think Kyle found my Love Dare book! I want to ring his neck!

We have a computer armoir and in the cabinets above the computer, I stashed all my books. Well, Kyle decided to stash a binder thing in there and when I opened the cabinet the other day, I noticed that the book wasn't tucked into the other books like I had left it. I have it so that the spine faces the back wall of the armoir and it still was, but it was sticking out from the other books. Grrrr!!! SO, I'm not going to say anything to him about it because I still want to pretend that he doesn't know about it. BUT at the same time, I think it may have done something in his mind because he's acting a bit differently. Hmmmm.......this'll be interesting.

Day 13: Love Fights Fair

The Dare:

Talk with your spouse about establishing healthy rules of engagement. If your mate is not ready for this, then write out your own personal rules to "fight" by. Resolve to abide by them when the next disagreement occurs.

The Questions:

If your spouse participated with you, what was their response? What rules did you write for yourself?

My Thoughts:

• Don't bring up the past
• No name calling
• No "D" word ever to be used
• Speak calmly
• No unloving physical touch
• No fighting in public
• Resolve issue before going to bed

Kyle wasn't involved in making this list because I knew I would likely get a similar reaction as I did the last time I asked him to help me out with some questions.

We rarely fight. I can count on one hand the blow out fights we've had. We bicker and argue, but fighting is not a common occurrence with us, thankfully.

Hopefully one day we can have this discussion because it would certainly be a good one to have...for future reference.